Oh hello hello! I am back with yet ANOTHER romance review and this is one of the darker ones I’ve read so far. I am proud that I am actually being consistent with my posts recently and I wish to thrive in 2023!
This is the third review in a row, however, I cannot stop reading dark romance anymore. It has become my escape recently, I used to read dragons and vampires to get away from this world but now I am reading psychotic college kids getting laid… hard… and often. Only this sentence is enough to tell you that this is my guilty pleasure so please leave me alone okay? we all know the magic of men written by women, so drop your brain somewhere before you start this book and enjoy… if this is what you consider enjoyment.
“Listen to me and listen to me well, Glyndon. I spent my whole life repressing my true nature, but I’d willingly embrace my demons for you. I’d turn into the devil, a monster, and whatever weapon I have to be if it means I can protect you. You will never, ever question me about it, do you hear me?”
I want to clear up something: I truly hate myself for being okay with this book. I say this in every dark romance review but I mean it this time. The steam in this book is delicious, but I cannot say the same thing for the rest of the book, including our main characters’ behaviour towards each other. I debated whether I should give this two stars or three but the talent in those steamy scenes deserved a solid star as it is, so we have a ⭐⭐⭐ book!
This review may include some spoilers so be aware before you continue.
The trigger warnings on Goodreads are quite understandable for this book. It is not a book that is easy to read, not as horrifying as the Mindf*ck series or the Killing Sarai series, however, it does touch up on some serious triggers for some people. Suicide, the idea of suicide and constant mention of suicide, violence towards others; including innocent, toxic family relationships, toxic friendships… the list can totally go on. The only thing that made these trigger warnings “less” triggering to me was the fact that these characters were uni students. Also, the setting was way too unrealistic so I wasn’t that triggered throughout the book but I was surely annoyed as hell.
The first thing which clicked with me was the fact that every single character in this book was a kid. Age of 21 at most. Some are connected to the mafia, however, all of them are quite privileged regarding their family backgrounds. But that is the thing with this setting, two prestigious colleges for spoiled American and English brats. That didn’t make a lot of sense to me because the moment they said “f*ck the police, this is personal” and decided to literally go to these people who had done something equally bad to probably kill or hurt very badly at the best case… I was like… EXCUSE ME what? No wonder why the justice system and police cannot do their jobs. You keep being this delusional little piece of nonsense and deal with things in a less mindful way and then cry about the police or the lawyers or the court saying that justice is not on your side. Guess why sweetie, guess why. I mean, you’d say that there should be a decent character AT LEAST to stop these brats to act like the world belongs to them for the f*ck’s sake and the heavens above. Does anyone’s behaviour in this book relatable normal? Yes, there are a few support characters and our female lead is also not fond of violence and whatnot but they are not enough to stop things from happening.
The book follows two students as main characters, Killian and Glyndon. Glyndon is English, comes from a loving family of artists and majors in art as well, however, her relationship with art is quite toxic since she cannot stop comparing herself to her brothers and her mother. She tries to get better and fights with this mental state but she is beaten by her own mind and she is a decent, somewhat relatable character. Killian is an American golden boy who has a loving mother but not so much as a father, his brother is quite toxic but I’d say that they all love him in their own way. From the moment they meet at the edge of the cliff to the end of the book, everything these two feel about each other is either indecisive, toxic or annoying as hell. Killian is obsessed with Glyndon, he is obsessed with her to the point when they first meet he pushes her limits and makes her give him a … you know. What does that mouth do? Killian is shown as a man with psychopathic tendencies however I’m a huge true crime fan and I’m listening to that sh*t to my sleep, the way he was portrayed wasn’t exactly psychopathic. I would say that he had the distinct behaviour pattern of a psychopath however, the fact that he considers himself as one, the fact that he talks on and on about his “true nature” (the f*ck does that supposed to mean?) and the fact that others around him mention him as one as if psychopathy is something easy to distinguish without professional- educated eyes… it didn’t seem real. He is a medical student and a very successful one and I love that fact, I always loved on-the-edge characters with psychopathic tendencies with medical backgrounds however even that didn’t make a lot of sense to me at one point.
The author wanted to create a character with psychopathy, and at some points, I liked how Killian was distanced, completely out of this world, and careless. His behaviour made sense because he is a psychopath, right? But LADY WHY WOULD YOU MAKE HIM POSSIBLY FALL IN LOVE AND DESTROY THE EVERY RIGHT THING YOU DID REGARDING HIM BEING A PSYCHOPATH? This is what I do not understand. Medically, psychopaths are capable of feeling love, HOWEVER, this situation varies from one person to another and it is hard to come by when they actually love, it is more in a destructive way than what Killian has for her: making her lunches, f*cking her in every sight, keeping her close etc. Of course, medical conditions cannot be seen as one prototype and of course everything matters from upbringing to education and so on, but Killian felt like a very toxic kid who is thinking that he is a psychopath more than a real one.
He should’ve stayed as it is and we could get along, but the change in the character after doing everything to show him in a particular way? Nah. I’ll just pass it. Does that make me hate him though? Not really. I do hate his behaviour and how ignorant he is but I want to believe that he is a good kid with just a broken heart. I also do believe that he will treasure Glyndon rest of their lives because I believe that he is an annoying prick but he is capable of loving to his heart’s content. Regarding supporting characters- well, they did take a lot of roles in the books so I was glad that I wasn’t only stuck with two h*rny uni students, it was refreshing but again, this book belongs to a god knows how many books series so it is understandable that the author built their characters from the very start.
After saying all this you’d expect me to give two or one star to this wouldn’t you? Well, I cannot because one I am a freak with weird fantasies and I enjoy reading this sh*t and two I have no self-respect so we love toxic masculinity in 21-year-old psychotic boys, sounds right? Only in books. Only in books.
I seriously have no idea how my husband deals with me either. 🤷🏻♂️
See ya in the next book. 🤞🏻💖
